Martial Arts Supply Workers = Comic Book Guy from the Simpsons?

Today I went into the local martial arts supply shop and bought a pair of escrima sticks. Can't wait to start choreographing a giant fight where everyone fights with sticks.

Anyways, this supply shop (i will leave them anonymous for their own protection) seems to be like any other martial arts supply shop I've ever been to. Now, I 've only really been to like 5 in my life including in Minnesota but bear with me. Blah blah blah I am going to cut straight to the point. ALL EMPLOYEES / OWNERS ARE OUT OF SHAPE AND DO NOT PRACTICE MARTIAL ARTS!!!! Okay, that's a bit of a generalization but that has been my experience.

I was talking to the lady about stuff and I asked: "Where do you train?" She replied with something like this: "Well, I don't train but we've all dabbled here and there in the martial arts..."

That translates into.... "I never really took classes but I've always been fascinated with ninja stars, nunchucks, and Chuck Norris."

Being an expert in martial arts is not a prerequisite in owning or working in a martial arts shop but it is helpful. Hmmmm, maybe I will get a job at a knitting factory.

Dragonball Evolution Review

So ummm I just watched "Dragonball: Evolution" Starring Justin Chatwin, Chow Yun Fat, Jamie Chung, and Emmy Rossum.

I have never been into the anime that the movie was based on, I

just wanted to watch it because it seemed to have at least some cool action scenes in it. I was wrong, and I wasted a few hours of my life watching this. It's not the worst movie I've ever seen, but it wasn't good... at all.

The movie is another prime example of a big problem in Hollywood. Studio execs must not trust that an Asian actor can carry a movie. So what do they do? They hire a Caucasian actor to portray a character that is clearly Asian:

This happens way too much. They should have hired that Mike Moh guy. haha.

Anyways, you can watch this movie if you're totally bored or if you've got something to distract you while you watch it.

Daily Dojo gives "Dragonball:Evolution" 3 ninja stars out of 10

Honorary Ninja

This is moments before Brett Favre chopped Aaron Rodgers in the neck.

Brett Favre deserves to be an honorary Ninja for his dismantling of the Packers yesterday. There is nothing honorable about stabbing a former team in the back, but it's the Packers!!! So.. I am rewarding him with the honorable title of Football Ninja.

Best Martial Arts Video Games

I am a video game geek. I am also a ninja. Hence, I happen to love it when video games involve martial arts. All 'action' games involve some sorts of martial arts moves, but for this list I will only refer to games with a martial arts theme. Some of these games were a big reason why I started martial arts, some of these games inspired me to learn new moves, and some of the moves in these games that once seemed impossible to me, are now moves in my ninja arsenal. Okay, on to the games in chronological order:

"Kung Fu" for the Nintendo Entertainment System (NES) AKA "old school N

intendo"

This game was the first game I fell in love with. This classic side-scrolling beat-em

-up game has it all. Kicks, chops, and AWESOME kung-fu sound effects. The evil villain Mr. X has captured your girlfriend and you must fight off a bunch of dudes that attack you with... hugs. I never even beat this game but as a kid I had a ton of fun playing the first two l

evels then dying everytime I got to the guy that throws knives. Who throws knives, Honestly!?

"Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2: The Arcade Game" for the NES

The turtles were my number one reason why I started taekwondo. This game was one of the reasons why I loved the turtles. This game is awesome. You can choose to be any of the turtles, and better yet it gave you the chance to take down the evil Shredder. Not only that, but April O'Neill is in the game. Hot.

"Ninja Gaiden" series for NES and later Xbox 360 and PS3

This series revolves around Ryu Hayabusa, the ultimate ninja. This guy flips, slashes, kicks, kills, and takes names. All without being seen or heard. Originally on the NES, this game had awesome cut-scenes, a cool upgrade system, and was insanely difficult. Needless to say I never beat this game either. In 2004 they rebooted the series on the 360 and made it a full 3-d action game. AWESOME.

"Killer Instinct" for the Super Nintendo and Nintendo 64

This was my favorite fighting game. It was one of the first game that used "3d" graphics in a 2-d fighting game. I still quote the game frequently when I yell out : "C-c-c-c-combo!!!!" as I pummel multiple foes with my ninja moves.

The "Street Fighter" series for all consoles

Chun-Li was one of my early childhood crushes. Basically all of the characters

are awesome and the special moves in the game have been pioneered what we now call "Xtreme Martial Arts." I had always wanted to do Guile's flash kick, and now that I can it's not as cool as I thought it would be but oh well it's still pretty cool. Oh yeah, and this game series inspired two horrendous Hollywood movies. Awesome.

The "Mortal Kombat" series for all consoles

"FINISH HIM!" Enough said.

The "Tekken" series for Playstations 1, 2, and 3

This is my favorite fighting series. One of the first games to make the move into the 3-D, Tekken is a deep fighting game that is fun and easy to pick up and play. I will forever hate Eddy Gordo for all of his cheap (but cool) Capoeira moves, but my favorite fighting character out of all games is Hwaorang when I believe he was introduced in Tekken 3 for the PS2. He was the first full-on Korean Taekwondo fighter in a fighting game and boy could he kick his face off! I mimicked my sparring style so closely to his that I would frequently lose matches because I would try to do some ridiculous "Hwaorang"-like move. It was worth it though.

Well there you have it. There are many other great games like Soul Caliber, and Virtua Fighter, but I simply didn't play those games much. If you're a martial artist and like games, try these games out!

Martial Arts Expertise does NOT transfer to All Sports....

My younger brothers in law are really into skateboarding. So much that they had a mini half-pipe built in their yard. They make going up and down that thing look so dang easy so one night I said: "pshhhh, that looks easy I can do it".

Lo and behold, here's the result(sorry for dark video):

Here's what it did to my back:

Needless to say it hurt a little, but that didn't stop me from accomplishing my goal of "Dropping in" as the skaters would say.

"VICTORY!"

Dancing with Martial Arts Stars??

For all fans of the martial arts: you now have a legitimate reason to tune into ABC’s “Dancing With the Stars” without feeling ashamed. Why, you ask? Two of America’s very own martial arts stars are contestants! Chuck Liddell of UFC fame, and Mark Dacascos, who is currently best known for his role as the “Head Master” on Iron Chef, have already performed their first dance and thankfully have survived the first week of elimination.

I think it’s great that Chuck and Mark are doing the show. I know that there are many people that think it was a bad idea (especially for Chuck) because of the possible embarrassment and threat to their machismo, but I think it takes a lot of guts to go out on national TV and dance around in tight outfits.

Many UFC fans believe that Chuck Liddell has already fought his last fight in the octagon, and if that is true I believe that he has made the right decision. In his last few fights it seemed as if he has lost his intimidation factor and edge. He will go down as one of the legends of mixed martial arts, but his time is done and I am happy to see that he has found a new gig so quickly!

Chuck’s first dance on the show was the foxtrot. I am no dance expert but he looked a little uncomfortable out there. In all fairness, he did much better than most were expecting but he was pretty stiff and I actually thought his footwork would be better. On the bright side, I’m sure he will learn quickly and he has a shot at doing well because is truly a likable guy and has a huge fan base in the martial arts world. He just has to hope that all the tough martial arts guys across America will call in and vote for him!

I had the pleasure of working with Mark Dacascos and he is the true definition of a martial artist. Humble, gracious, and a hard worker. Not only that, but the guy can still move like he’s twenty years old. In my opinion, he is one of the most underappreciated martial arts action stars of American cinema. Some of his notable movies on his extensive resume are: “Brotherhood of the Wolf” and one of my favorites growing up “Only the Strong.” It’s a shame that the vast majority of America has no idea that this guy is an action star. Most will see him as “that guy from Iron Chef.”

Mark’s debut dance was one of the most memorable as he did the cha-cha to the song: “Everybody was Kung-Fu Fighting.” He successfully integrated some great martial arts moves in with his dance without overdoing it. In addition to that, the guy can really dance too! If anyone has ever seen his movie “Drive”, this came as no surprise to you as he had a full song and dance towards the end of that film. Unfortunately, no matter how well he dances Mark has an uphill climb at winning the competition only because he is not as famous as some of the others. Hopefully America will get to know him and vote for him!

Regardless of what the purists may say about martial artists dancing around like “sissies”, I’ll bet that when the show is over Chuck and Mark will look back at the experience and say that it was just as hard (if not harder) than their work as martial artists. Kudos to them for stepping outside of their comfort level and giving more exposure to the martial arts world.

How Old is Too Old to Fight?

With the recent news of NFL great Herschel Walker making the jump to mixed martial arts (MMA), I got to thinking... How old is too old to fight? First off, let me say that I applaud Herschel Walker for doing what he wants to do. Walker is 47 years old and has been a long-time student of the martial arts and even holds a 5th degree in Taekwondo.

It seems as if Walker's motives are not financially related, and it does not seem to be a publicity stunt either. He just wants to experience another chapter in his life outside of football. Who knows, maybe Brett Favre will someday find something to do other than football (Yeah, right!!!) Other professional athletes that have turned to MMA **Cough** Jose Canseco **Cough** have resorted to fighting simply to earn a paycheck or to get some publicity and in most cases they ended up embarrassing themselves. I truly hope Walker does well or at least does not get embarrassed. The guy may be almost half a century old, but look at Randy Couture. The guy is 46 and is in the best shape of his life. Not only that, but has been UFC champion defeating men half his age on a regular basis.

Herschel Walker has been a star at the highest level of football, was an olympian as a bobsledder, and is now embarking on a MMA career. The guy is a renaissance man, and is super cool just for the fact that he is the closest thing we've had to recreating the movie "Cool Runnings." Almost all of the press I am reading is suggesting that Herschel is too old, out of his league, and will only succeed in making a fool of himself. I think it's a shame that these journalists are hating on Herschel for following through with something he is passionate about. We should all be so lucky to be disciplined and talented enough to be able to pursue a career in MMA.

What if he fails miserably? A fifth degree black belt in Taekwondo is great, but that training alone will not be nearly enough to keep you standing in the caged ring. I am a fourth degree black belt in taekwondo myself, and I know I have no business getting into MMA. One punch to the grill and I would probably die on the spot. That's why Herschel is undergoing a 12 week intensive training camp with some of the best in the biz. He has been training in MMA for a long time, and this training camp is sure to help, but we can't be sure of what is to come until his first fight is in the books. If he's pit against true MMA fighters, I predict his MMA career won't last long. If that's the case, I still think Walker is a winner for trying. Isn't that what martial arts is all about? It's about testing your own limits, pushing yourself to become stronger both physically and mentally. In the honor of the martial arts spirit, let's all root for Herschel!